How to convince your level tester that the weaknesses of your level are no weaknesses, so you do not have to change anything

by gabiza7
translated by Codo

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Initial situation:
The whole room is completely dark

Level designer: »That’s because of the atmosphere, because it looks way nicer when it’s dark. And if you want to have it brighter you could use the magnesium flares. Don’t worry, I adjusted in TREP that the player can have 1000 flares. If you play quickly, they last for the whole level.«

Tester: »Sure, but it could be brighter anyhow. Furthermore, black does not generate automatically more atmosphere. There should be some light effects and so on…«

Level designer: »Right, this is what I wanted to do at first, but then I read that you can save energy, if the monitor is mostly dark. And then I thought, that I could do this in my new level as well. By the way I have energy saving lamps at home…« (tells about the energy saving lamps and it is impossible that there are only standard light bulbs in the TRLE and builds no more light effects with it anymore.)

Tester: »Well, energy saving. I should try it, too. But what about this paper thin wall here?&laquo (uses a flare)

Level designer: »That’s great, isn’t it? If I use more paper walls I have much more space in my map, and more squares. Furthermore I heard that those thin walls are the new thing in architecture in the US.«

Tester: »I understand. When professional architects say it is, then it might be right.«

Short time later:»WOAH, WHAT’S THAT? HE WAS NOT HERE A MOMENT AGO!« (gets attacked by a SAS that appears directly on a square in front of him)

Level designer: »That’s an enemy, you have to shoot him.« (smiles proudly *information is exclusive for the readers of TRForge, because the level tester can’t see it in the chat)

Tester: »O RLY? Thanks for telling me. Seriously, why does he appear out of nothing?«

Level designer: »That’s clear. It is much more exciting. It is boring if you walk around and then suddenly an enemy jumps out of a crack in the wall.«

Tester: »Yes, but it is not realistic if it appears like that.«

Level designer: »That is not a problem. I can write in the readme that the people should imagine the SAS as ghosts. And ghosts can appear like that. At least I think they can. In Harry Potter they can, can’t they?«

Tester: »No idea, I never played it.«

Level designer: »No, that's a movie or two. You can’t play them. But stop, you are right, you can play them. I always died by the snails in the second part of the PS1 version. I stopped playing it at this point. The ratings in the game magazines were not so good after all, not as good as the ratings my level will become.«

Tester: »Very (un)interesting.«

Level designer: »Hey, now you have to watch out, something great is going to happen. Look at this square over there.«

Tester: »There are many squares that all look the same. Which one do you mean?«

Level designer: »The one over there. It can’t be that you don’t see anything. Even I can see it although I built the level.«

Tester: »No, I don’t see anything particular.«

The level designer takes the Lara in the level of the tester per remote desktop control to the square that he likes so much.

Tester: »Ok. Well, it still looks like just all the other squares. What can I do now?« Impatiently uses CTRL.

Lara collects a crossbow.

Tester: »Was it here before and I just didn’t see it?«

Level designer: »No, it was not. But that is the great thing. I adjusted the code in the LE that it is invisible. But you can still collect it like in the mirror room in the level from Core Design. Isn’t it brilliant that I implemented it so perfectly into my level? I simply left out the mirror room because it is not that necessary. Besides I don’t know how to built it.«

Tester is so confused that he doesn’t know what to say. Plays on. Lara glides down a slope and falls squealing miles and miles downwards. She hits the floor and the dying animation gets played (not explained explicitly because of the younger readers).
Game Over

Obliviously the player loads the save game in front of the slope of death. He looks left, right, up, down and searches for an alternative route with surviving potential. But he can’t find anything.

Well, down the slope again. Maybe there is something to grab on.
- No. Many squeels and Game Overs follow.
Well, then a closer look again. And again there is nothing.

After 100 attempts and two destroyed keyboards he contacts the level designer furiously.

Tester: »WHERE DO I HAVE TO GO? WHAT KIND OF BULLSHIT DID YOU BUILD HERE?!!!!!!!!!!!!«

Level designer (very puzzled): »Why are you so upset? You just finished the level. Don’t you get back to the start screen?«

Tester: »YES, OF COURSE. BUT ONLY BECAUSE MY LARA CONTINOUES TO BREAK....« (rants on the level designer)

Level designer: »It is meant to be this way.«

Tester (calmed down a little): »PARDON? I have never played a level in my life, where Lara dies in the end. That's totally illogical. As players we want to be heroes and not want to see Lara die in the end.« (MoH could learn a lession from that)

Level designer: »That’s life. Or death in this case. Actually I searched in the internet if there is something to finish the level. There is a way, but I didn’t manage it because the LE is soo stupid. But then I thought I can solve it by Lara dying in the end. It is much easier that way. Whatever. How do you like my level?«

Player shakes his head (exclusive info again), disconnects ICQ to the level designer and switches of the PC.

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